G-Pain

In life there will always come a time to experiment. There are some things I wish to experience more in life but I do now know which things I don't want to experience again. Among those things could be a bloody nose, the stomach flu, a rocky roller coaster, wearing spandex, ect...but I'm referring to more critical experiences which society tells us is the only way to have fun. I'm referring to drinking. Now I'm not saying it's wrong because it's not wrong at all! I'm just choosing right now at this moment in my life that I will not participate in that activity again. For one the after taste is terrible and two it makes my stomach sour turn sour.

Full circles are inevitably avoidable and heartbreaking. I already knew this but just the fact that it is true stinks. Problems are always and will always be there with or without the help of others. And why have I become this unmotivational girl (to myself) with no want to do well in anything in life. Well, that's a lie. I do want to do well but I just feel as if something is not there. Something is missing in the process. Trying and retrying to get it right over and over again and continually failing is making me calloused to the problems of life. It's to the point where I just don't care because the problems have been there ultimately my entire adolescents and now follow me into adulthood.

The devil is so cruel and I am an idiot to follow and stumble day in and day out. I don't seek God often enough for reassurance. He is my LORD, my Savior; He is Life. How can I avoid Him like I have my entire adolescents? It is utterly impossible for me to believe what has happened. I wonder if He cries out always? Is God always in pain? And if He were then wouldn’t His Heaven be more like Hell for Him? Yet for those in Heaven it would be “Heaven” as they say? How is it possible that somewhere so ideal, a paradise, a utopia can also be filled with the thoughts of Gods pain and suffering because of the worlds shortcomings? These are questions. I’m not stating these ideas as facts, just pondering the spectacular love of our Almighty and Powerful God.

Challenge:

Suppose my inquiries are true and that you are the cause of His pain. Strive to be a better person and be one less spear in His side, one less thorn on His head, one less tear He must shed.