Watching them was a transcendent experience
They were absolutely beautiful
Dancing in their innocence
There will never be another moment in their lives that they will ever feel more safe, more free, more beautiful, and more themselves than they did in that moment
A moment they all will forget
But she won’t
She gazed upon them through her veil of smoke and pain
She was jealous
She longed to go back
To forget
To undo all the pain and suffering she had caused
to her mother and father
The guardians who would give up anything for her
She drained them of all resources
Even their love faded for one another
They will try to deny it
It was only upon her departure they found the spark again
to her brother
The boy who she yelled at and was embarrassed of until recently
She didn’t realize she owed a part of herself to him
It is because of him she teaches
It is because of him she can love difficult people
It is because of him she learned patience
to a friend
She couldn’t handle him being different at the time
She was young and inexperienced
The last words she said to him
How she stormed out like a child crying out for no reason
She hasn’t seen him in five years
She wants to make it right
She misses you.
She’s not that girl any more
to her first love
Why did she let you go?
She loved him
He changed her perspective and showed her what she could have and deserved
He’s gone now
She has been in love with the idea of him for seven years
Each year the pain lessens
But each year she strays from that perfect world he created
Continuing to grasp and cling tightly to imperfect and unhealthy lovers
Each just like or worse than the last
to her best friend of old
She was lost
Still is
She wishes you were here
Back in her life
to the sister who calls herself a slut
She recalls the men they have shared
At times she ponders where the fault lies
She started it
She should have left them alone
She thought it was ok because they weren’t with you
Now she wishes she could take it all back
She doesn’t know if you would take back what you’ve done
In fact, you might do it again?
But to you too, sister, she is sorry
to God
All the blessings He has bestowed upon her
She takes and takes
He still gives
He never leaves
Even if she does
to herself
Weak mind
Weak body
The horrific things she has made you
see
do
touch
taste
feel
How have you not left her?
How have you not given up?
She wants to dance and not know
To lift the veil
Wash her stained skin
and dance in the innocence
KP Revised 4/10/2015
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